SHARED by: Leigh Goldman, Gymtime Mom

Read all of the research about the positive effects of family dinners and you’ll want to move mountains – or at least traffic and the frequently delayed 6 train – to ensure those meals happen.

Anne K. Fishel, Ph.D., is the director of the Family and Couples Therapy Program at Massachusetts General Hospital and an associate clinical professor of psychology at Harvard Medical School. She’s also the author of Home for Dinner: Mixing Food, Fun, and Conversation for a Happier Family and Healthier Kids. Fishel dedicates an entire chapter to the extensive body of research supporting the importance of regular family dinners (or breakfasts if that works for your crew). Specifically, they’ve been linked to:

  • Lower obesity rates among children
  • Better nutrition (with everyone eating more fruits and vegetables)
  • Lower rates of risky behaviors, including substance abuse, smoking, sexual activity and violence among teens
  • Lower rates of eating disorders among girls
  • Lower rates of depression and suicidal thoughts
  • Higher grade-point averages
  • Higher vocabulary acquisition than being read aloud to
  • Higher self-esteem
  • Better family connection

So what’s the magic number of regular family dinners we should have per week? And how long should each meal last? Fishel suggests quality is more important than quantity. It doesn’t necessarily have to be five dinners in a row. And those meals don’t need to be lengthy. Most are about 20 minutes.  What’s important is that you’re together and use the time to learn what’s happening in each family member’s life.

You can achieve this by making the dining area an electronic-free zone and ramping up table talk – away from just yes-and-no, one-word answer territory.

A parting tip as the mom of kids who are eight and 13 –

Try the Obama girls’ dinnertime ritual; they each name a “thorn” (bad thing) and a “rose” (good thing) that happened that day. You’ll be amazed at the stories and information this simple game elicits.

Be sure to check out Fishel’s blog, http://thefamilydinnerproject.org/.

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